Captivating___

= goodnight =

find yourself in that very song
even when worlds apart prove you wrong
time will stand and waters may still
running the the everlasting green pastures
He will lead the sunlight to dim
and the moonlight shining in the glorious realm
open up to what is closed
the Lord of our lives,
the Highest Most.

leaving and parting is part of life
even one leaves they other wants to die
its so funny its so amazing
that why life have to be this way?

goodbye my past
cheers my brethen
we are in this together
matilda,
this is for you.

times and times answers are silent
but Matilda chooses to believe
in the destiny she choses- she never regrets.

Sing with Love, dance with joy
Simple thoughts simple ways
simplicity got Matilda amazed
how one Guy can die for all
how 3 days can storm the world

matilda..
goodnight my dear

vis smiles*
7/30/2006 02:11:00 am

+++++++++

= matilda waltzing =

an angelic touch.
matilda goes all out to search for a fruit she loves
she searched high
she searched low
she searched almost everywhere
but she didnt know -- that
in a way some how, things are getting old

disappoinments and encouragements are just opposite each other
in a mirror matilda stares at the reflection
one she never knew
searching.. searching again
she searched high
she searched low
she searched almost everywhere but she didnt know.
that somehow rather, she is getting old.

matilda o matilda why have you been barren
speak forth that word of kabod
of agape of Elohim.
matilda o matilda
vis loves you so.
vis searched high
vis searched low
vis searched everywhere but ...
your heart is cold.

melt ur cold heart with the fire of Yaweh
run back to the tracks of hope and faith
gazing at the eyes of a beloved Saviour
wanting to lift up that heavy song
matilda o matilda
find yourself
in the house of God.

vis smiles*
7/29/2006 12:28:00 am

+++++++++

= matilda =

questions filled matilda
she doesnt understand
for once, she decides to stop breathing
her heart was supposed to weep
but gently it says "you cant bear to bleed"

matilda rushes back to her pillow
rested her thoughts unpon it
she cant dream any further
vis.
it could be yes or no
it could be eternity but you'll never know
it coulf be thru seasons of hot or cold
it could be of eternity but you'll never know
it could be a right it could be a wrong
it could be yours to hold
but i'll never know.

i've forgiven you.
matilda.
vis.

vis smiles*
7/26/2006 03:46:00 am

Matilda thought she wanted to rest her vocals
till she heard a faraway song
she removed her heels.. she ran towards to horizon of dreams and disappears.

a near faraway song
just one chance
just one breath
cuz.. i know.

she's singing:
I've love you
I've love you all along
I'll forgive you
dont be away for far too long.

cuz you know and you know and you know.
haha you'll never know.
its a so faraway song

Matilda wants to be herself
she wants to dedicate this faraway melody to her friend.
vis.
she feels the same too.

the last chance for the one last dance will come Matilda.
vis gives u her word.
matilda, you'll understand.

vis smiles*
7/26/2006 03:29:00 am

+++++++++

= A new touch =

A heavenly touch
so mild so tender yet
my heart cant help but skipped a beat
I wasnt who I am
He was who He is.

a clearer picture
a greater distance
a congreation in truth, in spirit
a simple heartfelt prayer
a faithful servant
a painful cry
a light --- the truth
a forgiving Dad
a healed woman
her dreams restored =)
Thank You Jesus

_____________________

i am forgiving myself.

and i am looking forward to tis sunday man! finally i can get a tan from the sun!! muahah!!
dont be surprised!

majie is going to love the sun well for a day -_-'' hahah

vis smiles*
7/24/2006 01:57:00 am

+++++++++

= Good =

Thank You Huiling for the beautiful t-shirt you've given me, filled with I love you(s).

The best part : you got the right size !! hahaha!

so touched ! =))

And Pretty: I place u close to my heart. Am praying for you

And Mabel: haha I believe in you

And Tim! : I have faith in you

And Ivory: I am not perfect, but God is; and God loves you

And Bihui: you know what you want and what you can achieve

And my puay oon: you know i am not perfect =)

And my dearest E405: You guys are the best spiritual gifts I ever have. =))

And Jesus: You are the Lord over my life. I give You all the glory and honour.

vis smiles*
7/22/2006 02:13:00 am

+++++++++

= way higher =

I have alot of things unsettled.

Something higher.

the mind of Christ.

it was a fruitful talk. thank you!! =))

this is how the joke of the deuter bag came about

one day king kong was walking to school carrying a ordinary school bag.

and so, ah meng approached him and asked: " king kong! wah your bag arh, time to change la! we got alot of books to carry to school leh! "

king kong replied : " I know its alot.. fear not. I have DEUTER !"

Ah Meng : " huh ? " *scratches his head

King kong : " aiya Meng arhs.. u see arhs, when i use my deuter bag hor, i put all the HEAVY things inside, but i dont feel any heaviness at all ?"

Ah Meng: " har! how can this be true!?? I wont believe!! "

and they argued and argued and argued.

I am carrying a Deuter Bag.
The burden is light =)
thank You Jesus.

vis smiles*
7/17/2006 10:26:00 pm

+++++++++

= I will not backslide =

I am getting better... really. By the grace of God.. the prayers.. I've felt all of them.. never missed out anyone. And I really want to promise you, fen.. i will not backslide. Mali.. I will not backslide.

*flashback*
something similar happened back then in early december, on a certain night. with the old cg members, at orchard. I felt nothing but grieve, wanting to seek for something that would erase this grief, but to no avail. I wanted to run away from reality, feeling helpless. but all i can see was stangers all around me, looking at me with strange glares that you wont cast on someone. i was alone at the bus stop. why do i feel all these? God! I know You are there.. but.. I just help helpless and infirm..and insecure... felt..like...shivering.

why dont they come soon? why they dont stop my tears? why they took so long to come? where are they!!! this was the os of my heart then.. the same questions reminding me.. going in rounds in my mind. i then realise, mavis.. you can cry now.

i cried.. as if no one will see this side of me. my longest cry ever. its not just an emotional thing.
i cried. orchard to home. i cried. back home i cried. filled with disappointment, i cried. "why cant you just..be there for me once" ? -- i was blaming him. he tried to comfort me as a spiritual brother. i thought it was resolved.. then.

after 6moths...
the unresolved came back.
the insecure, came back.

i am glad and thankful for sensitive members like pheng and mali. i thank God for them with whichever i can really be thankful for.

peng, i cant bring myself to backslide. i cant imagine hurting God, and hurting this cell.

i pray, for a heart close to God.
which will be able to unleash my burdens for him.

leonard, im burden for u.
nash, im burden for u.
mabel.. i am very burden for u.. very.

e405, i love every single one of you.
like jen, i am willing to lay my life for u all.

lastly, my family.. which i am greatly burden for.
walking in sin and unrighteousness.
i cant help to worry.

at the end of the day... God this is tough. but when the troubled seas gets tough, the tough gets going. I am glad, that Lord, You showed me the beautiful creation of this world. the most beautiful creation You could ever created.. Man.

likeness in Your own image.
let not my heart be grieved, but trust You with all i am.
all i want is Dada..Abba.

NOW.. RIGHT NOW.

vis smiles*
7/16/2006 12:32:00 pm

+++++++++

= never like this =

never like this...

hahas, i am glad glad glad that i am taking a break from all the school assign,ents and workload.. sitting alone at galileo cafe at the alumni clubhouse. just had pan-fried dory fish and a glass of blue coral soda for lunch..yum yum.. but a pity that they came 2hours later than my usual dining time.

true living happens only when i live beyond myself.

i really hope that every single minute, as i communicate with people lives will be touched...

anyway i felt that when it comes to radio production.. i am SUPER particular about the sounds..sound effects and the popping of mic, and the tone of the voice.. i am just very particular I didnt know why.. i really feel that this part of me - the dominant side is driving my partner yuqin crazy.. she is afraid of bushes and ghosts by the way..LOL no comments

things at home are going on all right.. my mum and dad never fails to nag at me every morning to make sure i really wake up.. anyway.. my dad's voice while i am in the sleeping mode is irrititating.. he truly has a technique on waking lazy pigs like me. hahas ah... i dont know what i am blogging..

thank u mali for blogging abt me.. hahah!!! =)) i really am shocked to see my name.

aiyo.. i am fallin asleep soon...
--___--''
hm.. shall go and find a corner in school to sleep and lie down lol

vis smiles*
7/13/2006 04:24:00 pm

+++++++++

= living beyong myself =

" true living is when i live beyong myself. "

meditate it hard mavis.

you got to step out of your comfort zone and manage what you're expected to do.
do not only meet the expectations but do beyond what is expected.
with Yahweh, all things are possible.

be a line crosser.
let me cross that line of compromise
cross that line of temptations
cross that line of impossibility

mavis... you need to start from where you left
plant this little seed ... water it with prayers of faith.

your dreams shall be restored
health restored
joy restored
strength restored
finances restored
love restored
for He rejoices in the prosperity of His children.

living beyond yourself.
is POSSIBLE.
amen

vis smiles*
7/12/2006 12:19:00 am

+++++++++

= A new chapter =

A new chapter
..........................

I am awaiting for a brand new day
i just did my $45 mani & pedicure in less than a week.
but i removed it, cos.. it was my mum's idea.. and she has 101 ways to make me do it.lol
She's been nagging about it since ages.
I really know...
Obedience is better than sacrifice
Mum, I really love you.

School assignments are just assignments.
i realised something,
i really cant live without Jesus.
tested and proven.
life seem so empty, so meaningless WITHOUT Him.
Lord, never let me go.

I'll hold on to Your promises.
gonna prove it..
by actions. =))
I need Your grace like never before.

I'm free!!

vis smiles*
7/07/2006 12:28:00 am

+++++++++

= Post 101 =

to: someone this melody seeks after

p.s. if our hearts met, you'll know this is for you. the last song which i am going to write for you. for the last time.
i've love you. it is not going to fade away so soon, but i am going to be strong.
do not worry for me. live your life to the fullest and fulfil your dreams and the aspirations.
i pin high hopes on you and i belive in you just like how you belived in me.
i am going to live my life to my fullest, pick myself up when i fall down. then i will know what living a life of fulfilment is.
thanks for the melody you've played into my heart.
a new song will be played soon. a new beginging.
i am looking foward to it.
Goodbye. xxxxxxxxxxxx

i didnt mean to walk into ur life and disappear
i meant to walk into it and leave my signature.

i didnt want to see you from afar and felt that you're near
but when you're right in front of me, you were never here.

you've seen my tears and saw my joy
but you never intend to share this gift of miracle at all.

back to the stage where i belong
my heart crying loud this mourning song,

"boy o boy where have you been?"
you playing king and she playing queen?

this distance is driving me to a conclusion,
i've seen the light
and i know i've made the right decision
- a heart purely only for Jesus.

Let go. Let God.
_____________

You, You are the God who will save
cling on to all that You say
and for always
You, covered my life with Your grace
darkness You've turned into day
when You gave Your all away.
______________

I am willing to let this go, to seek after my bigger vision in Christ.
I dont want to settle for something smaller than my heavenly relationship with Abba.

vis smiles*
7/02/2006 05:08:00 pm

+++++++++

= 100 =

POST 100 !!!

wow.. its the 1st of JULY and I am soooo glad to post my 100th blogger entry.
it has always been a joy to blog and to read other people's blog and leaving a footprint there.

well.. a mini recap of what happened today. (30-june-2006)
as usual, i am supposed to report at class at 8am for Ahliang's acting workshop. and sorry to say that i jolly well woke up up at 7.30am. =D when my school is in the GHIM BOON TAI. faints
anyway, i was so glad that i am able to flag a cab in 2mins time Praise the Lord!

The moment i boarded the cab.. the taxi driver said :

Driver: wah xiao mei arh, your glasses arh so STRIKING and STEADY man! I from far haven see your hand can see your glasses already.

Mavis: oh.. hahaha. ( thinking to herself.. God bless me )

Driver: ( then places his fingers towards his radio and pressed "play" ) SINGING LOUDLY chen wei lian's song.

Mavis: I really cant stand 5 chen weilian songs in a row. ( Esp when i am trying to get some sleep and the uncle is singing ) but nvm, i shall be kind. HAHA

but on the whole.. this taxi driver really made my day well. cos he merely took less than half an hour to transport me to Ngeeann. haha what more can i ask for right ?

_______________________________

then I reached school.

Ah liang's lesson today was awesome we spent like almost 2 hrs just on discussing on his plays and plots.. i love deep discussions like today's! it was truly a fruitful one. i never enjoyed fridays lessons so much like today's.

A Stranger at Home . What an amazing plot. ( still remember myself cursing right after the play ) lol .. but after a little while, it was great. the analysis made me love it even more. The drama the script the characters, all of them - have life.

well, assignments are coming in and i am trying to sort out my time well.

_______________________________________

anyway, i made my mum real angry today. but i went all the way to some place to get her durians and risked my life transporting durians on the bus alright! haha! But the durians are nice and I love durians!

before i got home, i was actually in town with yuqin. i was supposed to catch garfield2 with dajie, fen and ah tan. but yuqin was with me and i really LONG time never go out with her already!
I went practically manicur-ing and pedicur-ing today.. :D its $40 for both and $5 for my french art.. hehe and after that i ran into gx at orchard station, what a small world it is! when the world turns round, the people whom who met day the beginning will be the people you'll meet again at the end.

Alright. WORLD CUP -- Germany vs Argentina 1-1 ?? Anyway.. fen will be disappointed. hahas

I am going to host the freshmen interaction thing later today.. aww.. now having a headache.. i shall log off..

BALA MISSES MUTHU.

vis smiles*
7/01/2006 02:31:00 am

+++++++++
::achieves::
x July 2005 x August 2005 x September 2005 x October 2005 x November 2005 x December 2005 x January 2006 x February 2006 x March 2006 x April 2006 x May 2006 x June 2006 x July 2006 x August 2006 x September 2006 x October 2006 x November 2006 x December 2006 x January 2007 x February 2007 x March 2007 x April 2007 x May 2007 x June 2007 x July 2007 x August 2007 x September 2007 x October 2007 x November 2007 x January 2008 x February 2008 x March 2008